Love in Action

Peter Bregman: Leading with Emotional Courage

Marcel Schwantes

Episode recap:

Peter Bregman joined Marcel on the podcast to discuss the themes of emotional courage and leadership in today’s society, exploring how these concepts apply to current challenges around empathy and fear. Peter and Marcel discussed the importance of acknowledging and understanding one’s own shadow side to prevent insidious behavior and damage. Peter shared his thoughts on the dangers of categorizing people with negative labels, which can lead to a loss of curiosity and closed-mindedness. He emphasized the value of wisdom, which resides in uncertainty, and the need for emotional courage to take action in the face of uncertainty. Peter also highlighted the importance of humility in seeing all sides of an issue and avoiding the tendency to write off others as evil. The conversation concluded with insights on leadership decision-making and personal growth, highlighting the value of service, learning, and taking risks in pursuit of emotional courage and wisdom.

Guest Bio:

Peter Bregman helps successful people become exceptional leaders and stellar human beings. Global Gurus have ranked him as one of the top 30 best Coaches in the world and one of the top 30 best leadership speakers/trainers in the world. He is the award-winning, best-selling author and contributor of 18 books, including Leading with Emotional Courage and most recently, You CAN Change Other People: The Four Steps to Help Your Colleagues, Employees—Even Family—Up Their Game.

Quotes: 

  • “If you’re willing to feel everything—hurt, shame, anger, and passive aggressiveness—then you can do anything.” 
  • “Clever is certain, but wise is actually uncertain. I’ve seen lots of people take action they feel is 100% for the good that turns out to be wrong."
  • "There’s nothing that projects strength more than vulnerability, and nothing that projects weakness more than projecting invulnerability.” 

Takeaways: 

  • Face one hard conversation you’ve been avoiding—commit to having it this week.
  • Ask for honest, forward-focused feedback from a colleague or team member.
  • Reflect on your leadership: Are you showing vulnerability and curiosity to your team?

Timestamps: 

[00:00] Welcome and Introduction 

[03:31] Introducing Peter Bregman 

[06:12] Lessons from A Wild Leadership Workshop 

[09:56] Why Feedback Triggers So Many Leaders 

[13:38] Curiosity Is a Shortcut to Growth 

[17:47] How to Give Feedback Without Conflict 

[22:33] Make Feedback Forward Focused 

[25:40] Seeing Yourself as the Enemy 

[30:26] Why Division Makes Us Cruel 

[40:51] How to Help People Actually Change 

[42:32] Leading with Love Means Serving First 

[44:28] One Lesson Every Leader Should Remember  

Conclusion: 

Emotional courage is the willingness to face discomfort to grow. Strong leaders stay open, ask questions, and prioritize learning over image. By leading with honesty and care, they build trust, stronger teams, and better results.

Links/Resources:

Website: https://bregmanpartners.com/

Book: https://bregmanpartners.com/books/leading-with-emotional-courage/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/peterbregman/

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